Sunday, August 17, 2008

Retirement Blues 

Posted by Sasha at 8:13 AM ET

I promised myself I wasn't going to do this. I said to myself "No more kvetching, Sasha. Move on." And I will move on. Yes, my heart will go on. But not quite yet.

Break out the violins.

First off, Heather. Noooooooooooo. No. No. No. No. No.
In all fairness, she warned me she was going to retire, but STILL.

Secondly, my Clippers Spirit girls. Kristin, Rachel, Ashley R., Nina, Alex, Kelley, Laura, Taylor, and BOTH Tiffanys. (Or is it Tiffanies? What's the plural of Tiffany? Anyone?)

Oh. My. God. I understand that - like Menudo - every year some girls will come in and others will leave. And sometimes difficult choices have to be made. But I don't have to like it! In a little while, I'll be more excited and so happy for the new girls. But just let me have my moment, ok?

Laura is a freakin' rock star, you hear me? Rock. Star. Kristin left the country, for Pete's sake. That's as definitive a retirement as I've ever seen. (She's coming back though. Or IS she...?) And Taylor. Everyone loves Taylor. The squad won't be Taylor-iffic without her.

The only ray of light here is that Ashley R. was chosen as a Laker Girl. At least one of mah gurlz is still on the scene.

Shall I continue? Laura from the Vikings. Sharica from the Redskins. (Who, by the way, also left the country. But unlike Kristin, she's not coming back!) Destiney from A-Town. ALL of the Sonics Dancers. TWO sets of twins - one from the Cardinals and one from the Jaguars.

The list goes on and on. And if I hear that Megan Clementi retired from the Orlando Magic Dancers, I may have to take a few days off work. I don't see her in the photo, but I am convinced that she is there. I have some Valium on standby just in case.

The Bee Gees said it best: It's Tragedy.

This is a bittersweet time. It's like the end of senior year in high school. In those last weeks, you were acutely aware that all those people you'd known for years were about to scatter all over the country. You'd never be in the same room - or even the same building - at the same time, ever again. They'd all go on to separate lives, and you'd never know what became of them. It's that same feeling. High school is over. You're jazzed to go on to college. The summer between the two feels ... weird.

Okay, okay, I'm done. I will keep any further thoughts on the subject to myself.

(Until next year.)

I leave you with this fitting tribute. Can somebody pass me a hankie please?

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